This is a letter to the people who believed in my choked words and hesitant typing at 2AM, when the world is not stirring, but our souls are. 

I know when i end this and you read this you can have notions for me in your mind, but i hope you know you’re loved because you  believe in me, and you know THAT daylight makeup is nowhere beautiful infront of uncontoured vulnerabilities. 

I know people have fear and people are scared about putting off the fibre on their souls that covers their soul’s private parts. 

I know it is not easy but since you believed in my uncovered self of thoughts, notions and beliefs which are mute in daylight, i am thankful for your existence. 

I know it is not easy to tell someone why you believe in pen more than the sword, and to prove it in the middle of the night, i know it needs gust to tell someone why new people scare you, not because they’re monsters but you do not confide in them. I know you’re in your end of teenage years but your soul is old and that heart of gold that speaks magic when the world is asleep and make up is off and scars are visible, you’re beautiful then, i am beautiful then. And that beauty fades like the moonshine does. That beauty the world doesn’t see, the world clearly doesn’t deserve to see how few souls are connected that they know the spark, the vibe which no one in the world would be able to create. 

I am not exaggerating, because this middle of the night flight to the world of beauty of undressed souls, is something not everyone goes through, because the world is snoring and you’re letting your fear and insecurities ooze like blood does from an open wound and then all the pain slowly vanishes. 

I also know it is not easy to let another person enter into the space whose invite you do not owe to anyone. 

But since you let me in because the watchman aint aware, i am thankful. 

But then with sunshine we brush ourselves up, hide our flaws and deny the very words we were proud of last night, that’s how it goes?  Bizarre, it is? 

It is said you cannot love the same person in different degrees, but those degrees are high and chances are fair that in night i can be the other half but in the morning i am an unfaithful lover because we cover with garbs of false perfections and i cannot love you with these layers. Layers of stubborn, layers of strong, layers of massive contradiction with the previous night’s talk.  

The purpose of this letter is not to make you feel how connected we are, this can be named as an apology for the unacceptable nature of the day time that is ashamed to tell you that i need you. 

So 10 years down the line when your night life is about someone else, I’d be glad i was a part of it in the years when you had hopes of becoming what you are then, because i didn’t see you merely as a diamond, i saw you taking shape under heat, with a lot of strength, i saw you black, i saw you before the lustre you have then and i loved you still. 

I am thankful for the nights that have turned me into  who i am today, because these talks have made me believe that even if for certain hours during the night, just for those, my vulnerabilities have ears and are respected for these are cheeky and unreasonable under sun and for other people. 

That’s all, and i also have this letter to allow you to fetch better 2 Am people because make your soul’s turbulence and fascination might not be able to confine in mine at times and it’s okay if you find someone else because i have a piece of your soul now and that’s probably enough for mine to confine. 

What your soul is trying to tell you?

Sometimes you’re too weak to face what your soul is trying to tell you. 

Maybe because you know it already and are scared to get that confirmation. 

Maybe you’re in complete oblivion. 

And when you’re scared, you’re mostly scared because you fear change, you fear losing as if other times you’ve always won. 

You fear distance as if everyone else was next to you. 

You fear the end of it as if you were here for a forever.

But this overcome is a victory won,  you should be doing it, because if your soul tries to tell you something, there is a reason underneath. 

It can be about leaving and beginning, beginning something you were scared to, leaving something you cannot imagine a future without. 

Too often beginnings are adventurous and endings are signals. 

We need to end to start new. 

We need to start to reach an end. 

People : weakness and strength.

Let us just take an instance of life- for today i pick up people, since people are everything that our lives revolve around it is easy to create a conversation on them. But the insecurity i want to hammer my powers today is that why people make us weak?
Bizarre it sounds because what makes us weak is purely their absence, you’re all sturdy when they’re around, you’re complete. It is tragic we feel complete with someone around but it is what it is, we, often fail to become whole and search for pieces as if our life was a jigsaw puzzle. At times we create our imaginary ‘happy worlds’ in which those people are around and gather so many things to say when we finally see them. Those ‘happy worlds’ only exist in our mind because we, in our minds are trying to give voice to our mute vulnerabilities. Because we know these people will respect our ‘happy world’ and adorn our pain as if they were trophies of our soul.

But what i have seen is, we fail, our mouths fail to speak things what our hearts want to blurt out loud? 

Vulnerabilities still stay a dumb man who couldn’t speak even after being operated upon , our heart stays a place with all the mute insecurities locked in, and our mind still has this imaginary ‘happy world’ which couldn’t set up another dimension because we’re too scared to speak what we feel. 

My talk is not opposite gender restricted, my talk is not about introversion, it is about each one of us trying to hide our insecurities to ‘pretend’ to be strong! 

why? 

Because people will laugh our insecurities off? 

Strength doesn’t lie in holding back what your soul needs to let out, 

This ‘strength’ in hiding what you feel is hiding under the garb of societal values. 

You need the strength to be vulnerable, not infront of ‘THE’ world but infront of ‘YOUR’ world that lies in the soul you find yourself threaded with. 

Because unveiling your raw emotional self is scarier than stripping physically. Mastering the art of right choice to unveil before or mastering the art of controlling till the right time before emotionally ripping apart is difficult, but we learn, we learn with the right people. Right people feel safe, and that’s when we know we can fall apart and it won’t harm, we can strip, emotionally and this person won’t molest. That’s when your soul is free and hearts know no boundaries, you just speak and talk and grow. This is the purest form of connection.

To women who store wildfire in them.

It’s ecstatic howyears from now you’d be on your own, 

earning, successful 

and most importantly confident. 

You’d know your worth is more than

merely roaming for groceries. 

At 25, you will earn for your parents and you won’t be looking for

grooms online. 

You’d prioritise things like meetings and deals and not if has to be a red saree or a blue suit to your husband’s promotion. 

It’s time to realize that we don’t expect a man to have a house or car by 28,

what you need to understand is 

we’re above the ”good looks-better groom” or ”more bucks- better in laws” theory. 
Not every women dreams to be an obedient housewife or have a lavish indian wedding, this, i want all to know the males, females and the country That some women dream of being successful 

build up an empire, ride their Own audis and that’s how they want it, 

they want to get to a stage where their parents won’t have to work, they would do anything to let them hold their heads high with no more need to work from 9 to 5,

the ones who hold these aspirations are my favorites but not everyone dreams the same and its completely acceptable. 

But the ones who do, here’s a salute to your soul that stores wildfire, wildfire for keeping such positivity in a country like ours,  the mere thought is commendable. 

Your life is about much more, 

much more than a beautiful bio data for marriage. 

You’re everything that is enough to build beautiful castles, and at your Own call, you’re also everything enough to burn some castles down. 

Ambition.

One day in the distant or near future when i look back i hope i don’t regret. i don’t want to regret the choices i made, the places i chose to visit or the things i chose to buy; the dresses i chose for which i stood in the trial rooms for hours and the shoes that were too high, or career i chose to opt for, but then is it so?  is it only about the places, the things, and the career u choose? isn’t it about the souls you touched, isn’t it like you don’t want to regret the choice of people you allowed to confide in your soul? isn’t it about not regretting becoming vulnerable? It is, it totally is about the type of person you become and pose infront of the souls around you? Are you going to be pure enough tomorrow with choices you’re making today? 

wait! 
By pure i mean, you didn’t destroy anyone emotionally, you respected the naked vulnerabilities that came out of people who weren’t even having tags, and the secrets that weren’t about people but how souls untangle themselves in deep life crisis. 

What i am trying to say is simply about becoming a soul people love to wander in and about for mental peace.

When i look back in future at the life i lived i want to be that one person who isn’t too proud but is surely contended with the type of respect few get because of the type of person they are.

I hope i touch souls, touch them so i can heal and not let them tear apart, i want to heal pain that isn’t physical, i want to use words that are too magical for medicines to cure and becoming this is not something i can readily achieve, i have to cross miles and broken bridges; those that bridge the gap between outside serene and inside peace? 

I know i am sounding too unapproachable but being ambitious is good enough for a person whose ambition is merely  stringing the yarn of words together and sew them so that the final fabric is cozy enough for souls to rest in.